Monthly Archives: March 2015

7 things you should never say to your husband

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Don’t forget to back your words up with action.  One can speak all they want but actions just make it real.  jenn
  • Is your marriage making you sick?

    A 2010 study from Ohio State University showed that couples that fight “the wrong way” take longer to heal from physical ailments. While disagreements are inevitable in a marriage, there are things you might be doing that make it worse.

    Psychotherapist Julie Hanks, LCSW, and executive director of Wasatch Family Therapist, said there are things we say to our husbands that can be detrimental to our marriage. Luckily, that can be avoided by choosing not to say certain phrases.

  • 1. “Let me show you how to do it.”

    “I’ve seen in my own marriage and in my clinical practice that men feel good about themselves when the feel competent about solving life’s problems,” Hanks said. “Stepping in and directing your husband’s behavior without him asking you to can send the message to him that he’s not competent. When offering a suggestion to your spouse on how to do something it can help to approach it softly with something like, “I have a suggestion for you, if you’d like.'”

  • 2. “My ex used to do it this way.”

    Never compare your husband to someone from a past relationship, Hanks said, even in jest.

    “The simple fact that you’re thinking about former relationships may be emotionally wounding for the man you love,” she said. “Unless your husband comes out looking like the hero, comparing him to past relationships is a no-no because it may leave him wondering if he’s good enough.”

  • 3. “If you really loved me, you would…”

    This is an emotional trap for husbands, Hanks said.

    “Using this phrase often makes [a] husband [feel] that he can’t win,” she said. “To prove that he does love you he has to give you what you want even if he doesn’t think it’s a good idea or he doesn’t want to. Even if it works in the short-run, he’ll likely end up resenting you sooner or later.”

  • 4. “Why can’t you just be more like…”

    Couples therapist Amber Cleveland Lewter, LAPC, warns against comparing your husband to your friends’ or sister’s husband.

    “You married your husband because you love him, don’t ask him to be someone else,” Lewter said. “This statement is likely to cause shame or anger, neither will motivate him and either one will probably cause him to shutdown.”

  • 5. “You’re acting just like your father.”

    “We all have feelings good and bad about our parents,” Lewter said. “They are often more complex than others realize. While it may seem obvious to you that your husband is acting like his father or mother, the emotions that statement can bring are more complicated that you may realize. “

  • 6. “You just need to put your foot down.”

    No man wants his wife to tell him to “man up,” Lewter said.

    “This is just emasculating,” she said. “Calling his emotional strength or manhood into question will be damaging to both his self-esteem and your relationship.”

  • 7. “My ex always paid attention to me.”

    Again, comparing your man to someone else and telling him he doesn’t measure will not inspire him to provide what you need, Lewter said.

    “Instead it will cause or increase a rift, making him feel like he can’t please you and possibly causing you both to question your worth or feelings,” she said.

7 compliments every husband should say out loud to his wife

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 Don’t forget to back your words up with actions.. One can talk all they want but actions just make it real.  jenn
Do you know a husband’s words has a cleansing effect upon the appearance of his wife?
  • A mirror can be a hostile enemy to a woman. Although it is a reflection of her image — the image she sees is often a poor comparison to the ideal image within her imagination. You can almost hear the screams when you walk past the women’s lounge. Very few women leave a mirror with a satisfying sigh of relief — most exhale a few self-imposed curses murmuring out their disgust.

    It’s pretty obvious that “modern” culture is hostile toward women. The social antipathy causes many women to succumb to a false body image. They can never measure up — or as you’re about to see, they will never measure down—to satisfy the delusional nature of this culture.

    The Dove brand launched a campaign to offset the dysmorphia of how women measure beauty. After an exhaustive study, Dove found that only 2 percent of women around the world describe themselves as beautiful.

    Recently, Steven, a husband from Colorado emailed this question:

    “My wife is constantly comparing herself to other women and continues to put herself down. She is so unhappy with herself that it’s having an effect upon our relationship. She has no confidence. What can I do to help her?”

    Do you know a husband’s words have a cleansing effect upon the appearance of his wife?

    In fact, his words benefit her better than any secret formula of anti-wrinkle cream. Paul described this anti-aging, blemish removing, wrinkle cream this way:

    “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.” (Ephesians 5:25-27)

    Abraham spoke kind and comforting words over his wife when he changed her name from Sarai, which means “my princess,” to Sarah, which means “a noble lady.” This may seem like a subtle change, but it had an incredible affect upon her. Abraham stopped referencing her as a youthful “cutie,” and allowed her to mature into her beauty.

    Some men haven’t learned this lesson. We should allow our wives to grow into their maturity as a lady. Here are seven compliments every husband should say out loud to his wife.

  • 1. “You’re the love of my life.”

    You can’t say it enough. This phrase has incredible meaning and can’t be replaced. As simple as it sounds, saying “I love you” is still the most powerful compliment given by a man. Don’t be stingy about saying it. Say it often and without reservation.

  • 2. “You make that outfit look awesome.”

    Don’t say a dress looks good on her. That emphasizes the dress looking good. Rather say, “You make that dress look good.” She is the object of your affection — not the dress. It’s a subtle but powerful twist on an outdated compliment.

  • 3. “I want to get your perspective on this issue.”

    This compliment tells your wife her mind is attractive to you. Being involved in a difficult decision that you’re facing will draw out of her a complemental wisdom that she can add to your life. She will feel like you value her partnership.

  • 4. “You’re a beautiful woman.”

    Don’t say, “I like you the way you are.” The subliminal suggestion is that there is something flawed you’re willing to live with. Instead, say, “My attraction to you has only grown through the years, you get better and better.”

  • 5. “You make me want to be a better man.”

    I borrowed this line from the movie, As Good As It Gets, but this is probably the most successfully crafted compliment a man can give. I just wish I would have said it first. This compliment is the essence of the complementary relationship a wife has with her husband.

  • 6. “The intimacy of my eyes are for you.”

    This compliment reassures her you only have eyes for her. Job said, “I made a covenant with my eyes not to look lustfully at a young woman” (Job 31:1). This compliment is reinforced when you are with your wife in public but your gaze stays with her, and your attention is fixated upon her needs.

  • 7. “You’re all the proof I need that God favors me.”

    Solomon said, “He that finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord.” (Proverbs 18:22)

    I really like how pastor, poet and author Eugene Peterson paraphrases Ephesians 5:25-28 in the Gold Medallion Book Award Winner, The Message:

    “Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church — a love marked by giving, not getting. Christ’s love makes the church whole. His words evoke her beauty. Everything he does and says is designed to bring the best out of her, dressing her in dazzling white silk, radiant with holiness. And that is how husbands ought to love their wives. They’re really doing themselves a favor — since they’re already “one” in marriage.”

    Really, a wife is a reflection of her husband’s ability to compliment her. His words are like the seeds of a farmer that return the harvest he desired when he planted the crop. Remember: it’s a fantasy to expect a harvest you haven’t sown a seed to have.

    Ask yourself: is my wife confident in herself? If not, begin today to evaluate the words you speak over her. Sow into her kind, affirming words and watch as she transforms into a confident, mature woman.

What does the Bible say about health?

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Health

What does the Bible say about health?
Why should I care about being healthy? It’s in the Bible, 1 Corinthians 6:19-20, NKJV.  “Or do you not know that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God, and you are not your own? For you were bought at a price; therefore glorify God in your body and in your spirit, which are God’s.

What does the Bible say about health?

What is God’s desire for us? It’s in the Bible, 3 John 2, NIV. “I pray that you may enjoy good health and that all may go well with you.”

On what conditions was freedom from disease promised to God’s people? It’s in the Bible, Exodus 15:26, NIV. “He said, ‘If you listen carefully to the voice of the Lord your God and do what is right in his eyes, if you pay attention to His commands and keep all His decrees, I will not bring on you any of the diseases I brought on the Egyptians, for I am the Lord who heals you.”

What did God promise His people anciently? It’s in the Bible, Exodus 23:25, NIV. “Worship the Lord your God, and His blessing will be on your food and water. I will take away sickness from among you.”

Who is able to heal? It’s in the Bible, Psalm 103:2-3, NIV. “Praise the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all His benefits. He forgives all my sins and heals all my diseases.”

To enjoy a healthy life we must balance work and rest. It’s in the Bible, Exodus 20:8-10, NIV. “Remember the Sabbath day by keeping it holy. Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath to the Lord your God. On it you shall not do any work.”

Does attitude affect my health? It’s in the Bible, Proverbs 17:22, TLB. “A cheerful heart does good like medicine, but a broken spirit makes one sick.”

Stress on the outside need not mean stress on the inside. It’s in the Bible, Philippians 4:6-7, TLB. “Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything; tell God your needs, and don’t forget to thank Him for his answers. If you do this, you will experience God’s peace, which is far more wonderful than the human mind can understand. His peace will keep your thoughts and your hearts quiet and at rest as you trust in Christ Jesus.”

What can be done to prevent sexually transmitted diseases? It’s in the Bible, I Corinthians 6:18, TLB. “That is why I say to run from sex sin. No other sin affects the body as this one does. When you sin this sin it is against your own body.” Exodus 20:14, NIV. “You shall not commit adultery.”

What does the Bible say about health and food choices?
What was the original diet recommended for men and women? Fruits, grains, nuts, and legumes. It’s in the Bible, Genesis 1:29 NIV. “Then God said, ‘I give you every seed-bearing plant on the face of the whole earth and every tree that has fruit with seed in it. They will be yours for food.”

Immediately after the flood, when little if any vegetation remained, what did God say about diet? It’s in the Bible, Genesis 9:2-4, TLB. “All wild animals and birds and fish will be afraid of you, God told him; ‘for I have placed them in your power, and they are yours to use for food, in addition to grain and vegetables. But never eat animals unless their life-blood has been drained off.”

The people were to be careful about their food and make a distinction between what was good for them and what wasn’t. It’s in the Bible, Leviticus 11:47, NIV. “You must distinguish between the unclean and the clean, between living creatures that may be eaten and those that may not be eaten.” (See Leviticus 11 for further details).

The distinction between the clean and unclean was not just a Jewish prohibition. It was in effect before Abraham, the first Jew. It’s in the Bible, Genesis 7:1,2, NIV. “The Lord then said to Noah, ‘Go into the ark, you and your whole family, because I have found you righteous in this generation. Take with you seven of every kind of clean animal, a mate and its mate, and two of every kind of unclean animal, a mate and its mate…'”

This distinction between the clean and unclean will continue to the end of time. It’s in the Bible, Isaiah 66:15,17 NIV. “See, the Lord is coming with fire, and His chariots are like a whirlwind; He will bring down His anger with fury, and His rebuke with flames of fire……Those who consecrate and purify themselves to go into the gardens, following one who is among those who eat the flesh of pigs, rats and other unclean things—they will meet their end together with the one they follow,” declares the LORD.”

What example did Daniel set in the importance of proper diet? It’s in the Bible, Daniel 1:8, NIV. “But Daniel resolved not to defile himself with the royal food and wine, and he asked the chief official for permission not to defile himself this way.” What did he eat instead? It’s in the Bible, Daniel 1:12, NIV. “Please test your servants for ten days: Give us nothing but vegetables to eat and water to drink.”

Why should we exercise self-control in our dietary habits? It’s in the Bible, I Corinthians 10:31, TLB. “It is because you must do everything for the glory of God, even your eating and drinking.”

What does the Bible say about health and alcohol?
What do the Scriptures say about liquor? It’s in the Bible, Proverbs 20:1, TLB. “Wine gives false courage; hard liquor leads to brawls; what fools men are to let it master them, making them reel drunkenly down the street!”

Will using alcoholic drinks really affect me adversely? It’s in the Bible, Proverbs 23:29-35, TLB. “Whose heart is filled with anguish and sorrow? Who is always fighting and quarreling? Who is the man with bloodshot eyes and many wounds? It is the one who spends long hours in the taverns, trying out new mixtures. Don’t let the sparkle and the smooth taste of strong wine deceive you. For in the end it bites like a poisonous serpent; it stings like an adder. You will see hallucinations and have delirium tremors, and you will say foolish, silly things that would embarrass you no end when sober. You will stagger like a sailor tossed at sea, clinging to a swaying mast. And afterwards you will say, ‘I didn’t even know it when they beat me up.”

What is the result of over-indulgence in food and drink? It’s in the Bible, Proverbs 23:20-21, NIV “Do not join those who drink too much wine or gorge themselves on meat, for drunkards and gluttons become poor, and drowsiness clothes them in rags.”

30+ Stuck Inside Games for Kids

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There are always days when kids are stuck inside to play.  Often it is due to weather, but there are tons of other reasons why outdoor plan may not be an option!

Kids Activities Blog is excited to announce that we are working with Together Counts as a Blog Ambassador in 2014 to spread the word about Energy Balance.  Energy Balance means balancing the calories we consume with the calories we burn.  The Together Counts program was started by The Healthy Weight Commitment Foundation to help reduce obesity – especially childhood obesity!

That is why we have collected over 30 Stuck Inside Games to play!

Stuck Inside Games - Together Counts - Kids Activities Blog

 Active Things for Kids to Do When They are Stuck Inside

Cross-Country Skiing – This is one of the most genius ways of upcycling I have seen in a long time!  Playtivities created an entire ski set out of cardboard and…well, I am not going to ruin it.  Go see for yourself!

Paper Airplane Accuracy Game – I adore this from How We Learn!  It could be themed for something your child is currently learning or you could make targets to get kids throwing and fetching!

Math Pattern Hop – Learning to skip count can be a very interactive experience!  This could easily be done in doors with painters’ tape instead of chalk.

Balloon Tennis – Toddler Approved has a fun idea to allow her kids to play tennis indoors!  Kristina replaced a tennis ball with a balloon.  I think their racquets are very creative!

Recycled Bottle Indoor Bowling – Learn with Play at Home has a fun and simple craft that turns bottles into a bowling game perfect for indoor energy expenditure.

Flashlight Games – The fun doesn’t have to stop when night falls!  There are all sorts of fun games to play after dark.

DIY Marble Run – Buggy and Buddy’s kids created a fun marble run from things they had around the house.  My kids would love, love, love this!

Cardboard Stair Slide – Milk and Cuddles has perfected the absolute gold standard of outdoor kids activities moved indoors, a slide!

Super Mario Obstacles – Inspired by the favorite video game, you can create an obstacle course that would stump kids to get to the next level.

Homemade Indoor Croquet – Toddler Approved has a fun indoor game for kids of all ages {my husband would adore this}.  She and her kids created a indoor croquet game with all sorts of upcycled household items.

Mini Golf – Create a tin can mini golf course just like The Craft Train!

DIY Ball and Cup Game – We adore this simple upcycle to create a game that can be played by two or even alone.  There is no reason to leave your recycling bin untouched!

Climb a Beanstalk – Inspired by the story of Jack and the Beanstalk, 3 Dinosaurs and her kids created a painted beanstalk and then worked on several creative ways for Jack to climb it!

Play Store – This fun idea from Kids Play Space is a shoe store!  At first this doesn’t sound very active until you see the pictures of her kid playing!  What fun.

Learn to Juggle – Use these super fun-to-make juggling balls to inspire a bit of coordination practice.  Is the circus in your child’s future?

Pyramid Crash – If you shop in bulk, you will love this activity from Mess for Less.  She and her kids have all sorts of fun with a common paper product including building a pyramid and then knocking it down.

Cardboard Box Carnival Games – Oh!  I can’t wait to do this fun project from What Do We Do All Day?!  Your recycling bin can be emptied and transformed into a carnival.

Catapult Competition – Everyone builds in this game and then let the contest begin!

Fake Snowstorm – This is crazy messy which means it probably is crazy fun!  The Playtivities kids created an indoor snowstorm!

Animal Charades – These printables from Buggy and Buddy will have kids acting like a zoo!  What a fun way to shake out the wiggles.

Balloon Rocket – This is such a fun science activity and if you string up the clothes line indoors, it would be easy indoor fun!

Pillow Case Races – The Meaningful Mama kids had a ton of fun with their modified gunny sack race!

Hopscotch – The Happy Hooligans made a indoor hopscotch track.  What I love is that it could be modified for all sorts of jumping and hopping fun.

Grab a Handful of Craft Sticks – A few craft sticks and a kid or two can be the perfect combination for any of these 15+ active ways to play indoors.

Winter Olympics-inspired Yoga – These fun poses from Kids Yoga Stories will get even the most reluctant yoga participant stretching and holding with enthusiasm.

Racquet Game – Even if there is no one to play with, this simple activity from Frugal Fun 4 Boys will keep kids bouncing and running in circles to keep playing.

Build a Road – A roll of masking tape is the perfect way to create highways and streets all over your home.  Watch out for traffic!

Build a Castle – This cardboard box was transformed into a dwelling fit for a queen or king.  I love how KC Edventures’s kids created something really special.

Milk Jug Toss – Creative Connections for Kids has a upcycling project that will give hours of play.  A pom pom, a string and a milk jug becomes an active toy.

Avoid the Web – Create a spider web for kids to negotiate just like Hands On As We Grow.

Indoor Snowball Fight – Coffee Cups and Crayons will have the “snow” flying around your living room in no time.  This activity can have a fun learning component too!

Whew!  All those should be helpful in burning a few calories!

You can find out more about the Together Counts program by visiting Together Counts website, Together Counts on FB, Together Counts on Twitter, Together Counts on Pinterest or Together Counts on G+.

I have set up a Pinterest Board specifically to collect active kid activities and healthy kid food ideas.  Please stop by and follow!

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30 Stuck Inside Games for Kids - Kids Activities Blog